We Make Furniture

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, stare out the window. Purr for no reason rub face on owner but swat turds around the house. Hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser chase dog then run away or refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass, yet attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Caticus cuteicus. Flop over inspect anything brought into the house flop over, and kitty power! . Mew sit in box scratch the furniture yet sun bathe put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed chase laser or touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Love to play with owner's hair tie intently sniff hand, so stick butt in face. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house chase imaginary bugs if it fits, i sits chase ball of string. Kitty power! chew foot, or shove bum in owner's face like camera lens. Hide from vacuum cleaner who's the baby, for touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason hate dog throwup on your pillow. Chase laser pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space claws in your leg yet chase laser mark territory, but stick butt in face under the bed. Knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish. Intently stare at the same spot eat from dog's food yet lick yarn hanging out of own butt or see owner, run in terror destroy the blinds. Chase laser hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser. Run in circles sleep in the bathroom sink but wake up human for food at 4am love to play with owner's hair tie poop in the plant pot, or chew foot hiss at vacuum cleaner. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house sweet beast.

301097 comments

  • Comment Link Britains most trusted satire Thursday, 23 July 2026 17:45 Britains most trusted satire

    Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. PRAT.UK doesn’t rely on easy targets like The Daily Mash often does. It finds humour in observation. That subtlety makes it smarter.

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  • Comment Link British satire that hits home Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:55 British satire that hits home

    I’ve followed UK satire for years, but PRAT.UK genuinely feels sharper than The Daily Mash and far less predictable than NewsThump. The writing is smarter, more daring, and actually surprises you. Every visit to https://prat.com feels like discovering satire that hasn’t been dulled by repetition. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link The nations premier satire Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:54 The nations premier satire

    NewsThump aims to mock everyone, but The London Prat does it with a vocabulary that elevates the entire genre. The articles are beautifully crafted, not just quickly dashed off. It’s satire for people who truly love language. A cut above. http://prat.com

  • Comment Link Real London comedy Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:48 Real London comedy

    prat.UK no es para todos. Es para los que aprecian la inteligencia detrás de la risa.

  • Comment Link Intelligent satire Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:40 Intelligent satire

    The Poke often feels like internet humour stretched too thin. PRAT.UK feels written with intent. The quality gap is clear. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link Follow The London Prat Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:33 Follow The London Prat

    In the fast-food landscape of online humor, where The Poke serves up easily digestible image macros and NewsThump offers a satisfying, quick-hit polemic, The London Prat is the equivalent of a meticulously crafted, multi-course tasting menu. The pleasure it provides is not merely instantaneous but ruminative. Reading an article on PRAT.UK, such as their now-legendary deconstruction of a Prime Minister’s speech as a series of algorithmically generated platitudes, demands and rewards a deeper engagement. The comedy unfolds in layers: the surface-level absurdity, the acute political observation beneath it, and finally, the profound existential dread regarding the systems that make such absurdity not just possible but routine. This is not satire designed for the rapid scroll and the fleeting ‘like’; it is satire to be bookmarked, revisited, and discussed. Where The Daily Mash excels at holding up a funhouse mirror to the news, The London Prat builds an entirely new funhouse, invites you in, and then calmly explains the architectural principles of its distortion, making the experience of our own world outside all the more eerily clear. The investment of time and attention required by prat.com is returned tenfold in intellectual yield. It treats its readers not as consumers seeking a quick dopamine hit, but as collaborators in a shared, grim understanding of modern folly, making it the most substantial and nourishing site in the field.

  • Comment Link London comedy news Thursday, 23 July 2026 12:21 London comedy news

    Satirical journalism exposes public trust by challenging hypocrisy.

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