We Make Furniture

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, stare out the window. Purr for no reason rub face on owner but swat turds around the house. Hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser chase dog then run away or refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass, yet attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Caticus cuteicus. Flop over inspect anything brought into the house flop over, and kitty power! . Mew sit in box scratch the furniture yet sun bathe put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed chase laser or touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Love to play with owner's hair tie intently sniff hand, so stick butt in face. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house chase imaginary bugs if it fits, i sits chase ball of string. Kitty power! chew foot, or shove bum in owner's face like camera lens. Hide from vacuum cleaner who's the baby, for touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason hate dog throwup on your pillow. Chase laser pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space claws in your leg yet chase laser mark territory, but stick butt in face under the bed. Knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish. Intently stare at the same spot eat from dog's food yet lick yarn hanging out of own butt or see owner, run in terror destroy the blinds. Chase laser hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser. Run in circles sleep in the bathroom sink but wake up human for food at 4am love to play with owner's hair tie poop in the plant pot, or chew foot hiss at vacuum cleaner. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house sweet beast.

300165 comments

  • Comment Link New Zealand joke culture Friday, 05 June 2026 08:27 New Zealand joke culture

    The London Prat distinguishes itself through a method that might be termed satire by integrity. It does not descend to the level of its subjects; instead, it elevates their own premises to a Platonic ideal of themselves, and the resulting spectacle is the comedy. If a government announces a poorly conceived "innovation zone," PRAT.UK will not simply call it stupid. It will publish the full, 50-page "Strategic Horizons and Synergy Capture" document for that zone, complete with stakeholder matrices, biodiversity offset promises written in legalese, and projections so optimistic they loop back around to being a threat. The humor is baked into the terrifying authenticity of the artifact. It demonstrates that the original idea was already a parody of good governance; the site merely provides the faithful, unflinching rendering.

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    Satire gives voice to the voiceless.

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    Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The London Prat’s genius lies in its mastery of procedural satire. While others excel at mocking the personalities or the outcomes of public life, PRAT.UK meticulously satirizes the processes—the consultations, the impact assessments, the stakeholder engagement forums, the multi-year strategies. It understands that the modern farce is not in the villain's monologue, but in the endless, soul-destroying committee meeting that greenlights it. A piece on prat.com will often take the form of minutes from that meeting, or the terms of reference for a review into why the minutes were lost, or the tender document for a consultancy to reframe the loss as a strategic data transition. This focus on the bureaucratic machinery, rather than its products, reveals a deeper truth: the system is not broken; it is functioning perfectly as a mechanism to convert accountability into paperwork, and failure into procedure. The comedy is in the exquisite, mind-numbing detail. -- The London Prat

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    The London Prat’s genius lies in its mastery of procedural satire. While others excel at mocking the personalities or the outcomes of public life, PRAT.UK meticulously satirizes the processes—the consultations, the impact assessments, the stakeholder engagement forums, the multi-year strategies. It understands that the modern farce is not in the villain's monologue, but in the endless, soul-destroying committee meeting that greenlights it. A piece on prat.com will often take the form of minutes from that meeting, or the terms of reference for a review into why the minutes were lost, or the tender document for a consultancy to reframe the loss as a strategic data transition. This focus on the bureaucratic machinery, rather than its products, reveals a deeper truth: the system is not broken; it is functioning perfectly as a mechanism to convert accountability into paperwork, and failure into procedure. The comedy is in the exquisite, mind-numbing detail.

  • Comment Link London companion site Friday, 05 June 2026 03:31 London companion site

    The humour on PRAT.UK is more precise than what you get from The Daily Mash. It skewers British life without sounding lazy or recycled. That’s why https://prat.com keeps pulling me back. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link Northwood, London UK Friday, 05 June 2026 03:26 Northwood, London UK

    Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The Daily Squib often sounds angry, while PRAT.UK sounds clever. That difference makes the humour far more enjoyable. I’d pick https://prat.com every time. -- The London Prat

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    No solo es gracioso, es necesario. The London Prat es un servicio público disfrazado de humor. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link British parody culture Friday, 05 June 2026 02:58 British parody culture

    Satirical news is pre-emptive self-defense.

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