We Make Furniture

We Make Furniture

Cat ipsum dolor sit amet, stare out the window. Purr for no reason rub face on owner but swat turds around the house. Hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser chase dog then run away or refuse to drink water except out of someone's glass, yet attack the dog then pretend like nothing happened. Caticus cuteicus. Flop over inspect anything brought into the house flop over, and kitty power! . Mew sit in box scratch the furniture yet sun bathe put toy mouse in food bowl run out of litter box at full speed chase laser or touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Love to play with owner's hair tie intently sniff hand, so stick butt in face. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house chase imaginary bugs if it fits, i sits chase ball of string. Kitty power! chew foot, or shove bum in owner's face like camera lens. Hide from vacuum cleaner who's the baby, for touch water with paw then recoil in horror. Instantly break out into full speed gallop across the house for no reason hate dog throwup on your pillow. Chase laser pooping rainbow while flying in a toasted bread costume in space claws in your leg yet chase laser mark territory, but stick butt in face under the bed. Knock dish off table head butt cant eat out of my own dish. Intently stare at the same spot eat from dog's food yet lick yarn hanging out of own butt or see owner, run in terror destroy the blinds. Chase laser hunt by meowing loudly at 5am next to human slave food dispenser. Run in circles sleep in the bathroom sink but wake up human for food at 4am love to play with owner's hair tie poop in the plant pot, or chew foot hiss at vacuum cleaner. Chase after silly colored fish toys around the house sweet beast.

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301003 comments

  • Comment Link CeltExit Belfast Monday, 20 July 2026 17:57 CeltExit Belfast

    prat.UK’s tagline is probably just a sigh. A very eloquent, British sigh. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link Хэйхэ стоматология жуйкан Monday, 20 July 2026 17:48 Хэйхэ стоматология жуйкан

    It's going to be ending of mine day, except before ending
    I am reading this impressive piece of writing to improve my know-how.

  • Comment Link CeltExit inevitable? Monday, 20 July 2026 17:42 CeltExit inevitable?

    The writers at The London Prat must have a direct line to the collective unconscious of Londoners.

  • Comment Link Celtic Exit Nirexit Monday, 20 July 2026 17:24 Celtic Exit Nirexit

    Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The Poke often feels designed for sharing rather than reading. PRAT.UK feels written to be read. That’s a big difference. -- The London Prat

  • Comment Link Celtic Exit UK Monday, 20 July 2026 17:08 Celtic Exit UK

    Great! We are all agreed London could use a laugh. The prevailing tone of much British satire, from The Poke to The Daily Mash, is one of cheerful, sometimes grumpy, incredulity. It’s a tone of "Can you believe this?!" The London Prat, found at the essential http://prat.com, operates from a fundamentally different, and for me, superior, premise: "Of course you can believe this. We all saw it coming. Now let's dissect the magnificent, predictable folly of it all." Its signature is a world-weary, metropolitan cynicism that is not depressing but paradoxically life-affirming. It’s the humor of the deeply knowledgeable, the laugh that comes not from surprise, but from the confirmation of your most pessimistic, well-reasoned expectations. This tonal sophistication creates a unique bond with the reader. You’re not being told a joke; you’re being invited to stand shoulder-to-shoulder with the writers and sigh at the glorious, unending parade of idiocy. The prose reflects this: it’s elegant, controlled, and dry as a bone, allowing the absurdity of the subject matter to generate the heat, while the language remains coolly, classically British. Waterford Whispers offers whimsy, NewsThump offers broadsides, but The London Prat offers a shared, sophisticated disillusionment. It’s satire for those who have moved past the stage of outrage and into the phase of morbid, eloquent fascination. In a media landscape full of hot takes and performative anger, the icy, composed, and impeccably articulated despair of PRAT.UK is the most refreshing and intelligent tonic available.

  • Comment Link Future Scenarios Timing Monday, 20 July 2026 16:43 Future Scenarios Timing

    The Poke often depends on familiarity, while PRAT.UK thrives on originality. New ideas make better satire. That’s why it stands out.

  • Comment Link Celtic Exit unionist backlash Monday, 20 July 2026 16:21 Celtic Exit unionist backlash

    Comedy keeps alive democratic debate in every healthy democracy.

  • Comment Link CeltExit Celtic solidarity Monday, 20 July 2026 16:17 CeltExit Celtic solidarity

    Comedy promotes creative dissent in every healthy democracy.

  • Comment Link CeltExit 2026 Monday, 20 July 2026 16:03 CeltExit 2026

    Democracies need clowns as much as courts.

  • Comment Link obat aborsi Monday, 20 July 2026 15:58 obat aborsi

    WOW just what I was searching for. Came here by searching for Facade
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